Happy Birthday Matthew!

Today we will be celebrating your fifth birthday. How can that be? Five years have gone by so quickly.

Your name, Matthew, means "Gift of God" and you truly are. As we had lost a baby in 2001 and then a miscarriage the following year, to learn we were expecting again brought lots of emotion. It was a long 9 months for me. Only because I worried so much and prayed every day for you to be a healthy baby. I was so worried that I actually rented a portable doppler machine just so I could check your heartbeat everyday.

There was a very bad snow storm 2 days before you were born and I had heard that the hospitals were cancelling some surgerys. I prayed that all would go as planned for your delivery. It did. We went to the hospital early in the morning and at 10am you were born via c-section.

You came out screaming and Dr. Walker said "this boy is mad". We were moved into a recovery room where you and daddy could stay with me. This was different than when Lauren was born, I had to go into a recovery area by myself. So it was very nice that we were all together until we were put into a regular room.

Daddy went home that night to be with Lauren and came back to the hospital the next day. When he came in the morning he asked me if I had heard about the fire. Of course I had no idea what he was talking about but he put the news on and there had been a terrible fire at a local night club. 100 people died. Many I had gone to school with, a friend of the family, and people I used to work with. So as we celebrate your birth we also remember all the victims of the Station Night Club.

You were a good baby. Always smiling, always happy. When you were four months old you gave us quite the scare...you had to be admitted to the hospital for menangitis. You spent four days in the hospital and they were the longest 4 days of my life. I hated seeing you there in the crib with an IV and sleeping for so long. After a week you were back to your old self.

As a toddler you really gave us a run for our money. Very active, full of mischief and sometimes not a very good listener. There were days when I didn't know what I was going to do with you. But you always had a smile on your face. Always made us laugh and you still do.

I'm very proud of the boy you've become. You now are a very good listener. You are so smart, kind and thoughtful. You impress me -- when you are done watching tv you turn it off, you put your toys away. You love to joke. You love to talk. We have some pretty good conversations. I love when I tuck you in and tell you that you are "my sweet boy" you always respond and say "you are my sweet mommy". I love when you give me a kiss for no reason. I love the dimples in your cheek. I love your energy. I love everything about you.

Soon you'll be playing t-ball, going to Kindergarten, becoming more independent and I will miss these little boy days but until then, I will enjoy every moment because I adore you. When I hear the song MY WISH by Rascall Flatts I think of you because what they sing are things I wish for you as you grow.

I hope that the days come easy and the moments pass slow,

And each road leads you where you want to go,

And if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,

I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.

And if one door opens to another door closed,

I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,

If it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile,

But more than anything, more than anything,

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,

Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,

You never need to carry more than you can hold,

And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,

I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,

Yeah, this, is my wish.

I hope you never look back, but ya never forget,

All the ones who love you, in the place you left,

I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,

And you help somebody every chance you get,

Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,

And you always give more than you take.

But more than anything, yeah, and more than anything,

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,

Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,

You never need to carry more than you can hold,

And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,

I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,

This is my wish

Happy Birthday Baby Boy! I love You